


the power of friendship (and lesbians)

by stargayzing



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: (Oh wait I do), Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angus has three Moms now, Bad Flirting, Camp Goodfriend, Canon Compliant, F/F, Fluff and Humor, Sorry guys I don't make the rules, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-06
Updated: 2017-02-06
Packaged: 2018-09-18 19:36:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,405
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9400019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stargayzing/pseuds/stargayzing
Summary: I've been working on this for a while now, and it's almost finished! This was a labour of love but I'll be glad to be able to focus on other stuff now. Especially withTAZ Lady Weekcoming up next week - go check that out if you haven't already!!





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I've been working on this for a while now, and it's almost finished! This was a labour of love but I'll be glad to be able to focus on other stuff now. Especially with [TAZ Lady Week](https://tazladyweek.tumblr.com/post/156134047280/announcing-the-the-adventure-zone-lady-zone) coming up next week - go check that out if you haven't already!!

The four of them - Angus, Noelle, Carey and Killian - make their way through the small chamber and down the stone stairs to start their very own Trial of Teamwork. The staircase is reasonably well lit and the four of them are in pretty high spirits after a morning of pancakes and relaxing.

“Did they _really_ have to take our items?” Carey complains. "That's dragonist. How dare they take my horde?"

Killian smiles a little at Carey's goofs and then shrugs. “I don't think we're going to need them, personally. Did you see the inscription?”

“Yeah. _Enter colleagues, exit best friends_.” Carey and Killian exchange an amused glance.

They reach the end of the staircase and enter a large room that's surprisingly warm for the fact that it’s underground and… kind of shitty. Killian's been in haunted houses made my children that were spookier than this.

“Is this was dungeons are like?” Angus asks.

“They usually smell worse,” Killian replies off-handedly. She prods one of the walls and her finger goes right through it. She stares at the hole for a second before guiltily shuffling away.

Carey looks like she's dying to make an acerbic comment about the cheap props and trying-too-hard atmosphere but Killian inclines her head to where Angus is standing, a determined frown on his face and stars in his eyes. He's clearly _very_ excited about his first dungeon experience.

Suddenly, a portcullis drops and blocks the way they just came. Killian jumps a little and then glares at her girlfriend, daring her to make a comment. A second later, a loud speaker clicks on and the – unfortunately unmistakeable – voice of Art Goodfriend rings out. “If you'll move forward, we can begin our Trial of Teamwork!How exciting!"

Almost simultaneously, the four of them - well, Noelle only in spirit - raise their eyebrows a little. Then Angus leads the way into the large adjacent chamber, the others following dutifully. He comes to a stop by the edge of a shallow pit, the bottom of which is covered in red carpet. Bridging the pit is a series of wooden planks. When all four of them have stepped towards the edge, Art explains: “For this first trial, your entire team has to get across the planks. But be careful because the floor... is lava."

They stand there in incredulous silence.

"Gosh," Noelle finally says, "I used to play this as a kid. Mind you, I was a little more... alive then."

“So it's like, figurative lava. Not literal lava.” Angus says, frowning a little. “What exactly is the point of this?”

“Let's just get this over with. Ango? You want to go first?”

Angus’ nods in reply to Killian’s question and steps onto the first plank. Step after step, he very carefully and slowly crosses over. When he’s on solid ground on the other side, he calls over: “Okay! Next person can come over now!”

Killian decides to go next and just walks like she would normally do, entirely unimpressed. When she’s standing next to Angus she frowns. “Pretty boring so far.”

Carey immediately responds with: "Hey guys! Watch this."

She judges the distance and the location of the planks, then gathers momentum and cartwheels across. It’s amazing. Killian highfives her.

Then, the three of them turn to watch the last one to go. Noelle just... floats across.

Carey scratches her head. "... Is that it?"

The loud speaker clicks on again and Art says: "Well that wasn't... really teamwork. Any of you, at all. So you're going to get a teamwork penalty."

"WHAT?" Angus sounds _devastated_. Killian puts a reassuring hand on his shoulder and glares up at the ceiling. "Hey now," she interjects, "we may have gotten through it alone, but we would have helped each other if we needed it."

"Besides," Carey says, "we didn't actively sabotage each other – that's got to count for something, right?"

"OK. Since you're all standing up for each other so nicely, I will take back the penalty. Now... what was that trial supposed to teach you?"

"Agility?" Killian guesses.

"Teamwork, probably." Killian elbows Carey, but can't entirely stop herself from laughing.

Art, undeterred, chimes out with: "It means that we all walk the same path in life and its easier with help from friends."

"That's sort of sweet," Noelle says, even as Carey mumbles, "Did you get that out of a fortune cookie?"

Angus blinks as he hears her say that and then straightens up. "Haha. Right. This... is kind of silly, isn't it? Like a game for little kids."

"Hey," Killian says, ruffling his hair, "we're not going to learn anything if we don't take this seriously, okay? But really, it's not an _actual_ dungeon, so let's remember to have fun too. Feel free to goof off as much as you want."

***

Art has them walk into the next room to face the second trial, which Killian hopes is going to be a little less lame than the last one. She blinks when she sees the smooth, wooden wall, embedded into the floor and more than ten feet tall. 

"Let me guess," she says, and Art interrupts her with: "You have to help each other over the wall!"

Killian eyes their new obstacle. It seems pretty sturdy, no hand holds she can see. They will have to work together on this one. Art confirms this when he says: "Make sure you don't leave your guys behind! Or, in this case, gals."

Killian flexes a little, then beckons Carey to the foot of the wall. "Come on then, best gal." She easily boosts her up and Carey jumps a little, lodging one of her daggers into the wall as a decent handhold and climbing the rest of the way up. When she's at the top, she nods down to Killian, who picks up Angus and gives him a boost too. Angus - a little hesitantly but still nimbly - uses the dagger as a foothold and then takes the hand Carey's offering and lets her pull him the rest of the way up. That's half of them up there, then. Awesome.

Before she can make her own attempt, Noelle floats up and grabs an indignant Killian under her armpits, jetpacking her to the top (Killian reaches out and plucks the dagger from the wall as she passes). As she carefully sets Killian down on the wall, Noelle comments: "Y'know, guys... I feel like these trials weren't entirely designed with floating robots in mind."

"Well, to be fair... Probably not."

Noelle laughs a little.

"Wow, you cleared that one effortlessly!" Art comments, exuberant. "I'm sure you know what this one was about."

Silence. Carey nudges Angus. "Psst. What's the answer?"

He blinks, then pushes his glasses further up his nose from where they slipped down a little. "Um... you can overcome even the biggest obstacles if you help each other?"

"Correct! You guys are really good! But can you handle... the third trial?"

***

"It's time for trust falls!"

Killian peers over the edge. "Fifteen feet... is kind of high up..."

Angus looks a li'l nervous. Carey gently pushes him aside to step up towards the ledge. "I'll go first. Kils, catch me?"

"You got it," Killian says, and makes her way down the stairs into catching position.

Gracefully, with her arms extended into a T like a cliff diver, Carey lets herself fall backwards. Killian catches her effortlessly, twirling her around in a bridal carry and then kissing her. It's very cute. From their position still up on the wall, Angus and Noelle clap.

They untangle eventually – after Art clears his throat over the speaker – and Carey stands under the wall, ready to go.

Next is Noelle, who deactivates her flotation device and drops down like a stone. Carey has to brace herself to catch her and huffs out: "A little warning, next time?"

"Sorry," Noelle says sheepishly, going back to floating and moving out of Carey's hold. Sensing it's going to be her turn soon, Killian starts to make her way up the wall.

But first, it's Angus, looking adorably determined. "You _will_ catch me, right?"

"Of course we will, Angus."

Noelle and Carey watch him dither, hesitate on the edge and then gulp and jump off the wall. Noelle catches him easily in her mismatched robot arms and just holds him for a second. "That wasn't so bad now, was it?"

Angus blushes. "You don't have to baby me. I'm fine. I'm a big boy now!"

"Right. Sorry." She sets him down.

Killian breaks the awkward moment by calling down, "You guys ready?"

"Let's all catch her together," Carey suggests. The three of them huddle closer together under the wall, and when Killian jumps backwards they lift her up like a stage diver. She laughs. When they set her down, Carey gives their youngest team member a thoughtful look. "Y'know, Angus... Trust falls can be pretty scary. Even for adults."

“But you didn't seem scared.”

“Well, I wasn't. Because I knew Killian was going to catch me.”

Noelle's fuse lights up bright blue as she coos: “You two are such sweethearts...”

“Another trial cleared!” Art chimes in. “This is just a breeze for you, huh? What do you think this one was about?”

“Trusting your team mates,” Angus says, and grins.

***

“Congratulations!” Killian is starting to get a headache from Art's enthusiasm for everything. “You've successfully finished the first four trials! Last up is-”

“Wait,” Carey interrupts. “That was only three.”

“True, but the author couldn't think of a good way to do the fourth trial so we're skipping it. Don't think about it too much!”

Angus and Killian exchange a confused look.

“What was the fourth trial?” Noelle speaks up.

There's a moment of silence until Art cheerfully replies: “The Totem of Constructive Criticism! It's a real crowdpleaser usually, but, well. Let's move on! … Guys?”

The gang ignores him.

“Constructive criticism, huh?” Killian grimaces. “Not exactly my forte.”

“It's probably a good thing we skipped that,” Angus admits. “Merle and the others always say I don't take criticism well...”

The adults exchange solemn looks. Then Noelle floats over to Angus and gently ruffles his hair. “Y'know, Angus, those three boys can be real mean sometimes.”

“Yeah, insults aren't constructive criticism,” Carey chimes in. “In fact, I don't think Magnus and the gang have ever been constructive in their entire lives.”

“Oh, they're not insulting me!” Angus hurries to reassure. “They're just... teasing me. Like friends do.”

“Uhh...”

“And I guess sometimes they hurt my feelings but that's okay. They don't mean anything by it, right?”

“Ango,” Killian says, crouching down so she's eyelevel with him. “You're-” _still a little kid_ , she thinks, but considering how much pride Angus takes in being all grown up that's probably not what he wants to hear, “-their coworker. And there's all sorts of HR regulations, not to mention basic human decency, about treating your coworkers right.”

“That's true.” Angus says, sounding thoughtful.

Killian gets back up and Carey casually puts an arm around her waist. “Good thing you didn't have to do me,” she jokes, “since I can imagine how that would go. _I don't know what to say babe you're literally perfect.”_

“Hey,” Killian says, mock-offended. Carey ignores her and rolls her eyes. “God you're a sap.”

“I'll stop being sappy when you stop being perfect,” Killian shoots back, giving Carey a light shove.

Carey shoves back. “I'll stop being perfect when you stop being a poopyhead.”

“Well I-”

Art interrupts, sounding resigned: “Guys, guys. That's a teamwork penalty, I'm afraid.”

Carey's jaw drops. "For _flirting_?!"

Killian glares at the ceiling. “That's- you know what? I don't even care. What's next?” She huffs.

Angus, looking serious all of a sudden, speaks up: "Wait, sirs. What is the penalty?"

“Guess you'll find out soon!” Art says, sounding only slightly strained. “If you'll move on to the final trial? … Please?”

***

The wall Art directs them to is large and seemingly made of cobblestone, with a round wooden door. Above the door is a crudely painted sign with the word "ARENA" on it.

“So a fight, huh?” Killian says, cracking her knuckles.

“That's right! You'll be facing a deadly opponent – it's up to you to protect each other and work together to take him down. Don't go overboard though. Please? No killing or maiming.”

Carey shrugs and kicks open the door. The four of them walk through it into the large, circular 'Arena' – which looks more like a playground, covered in foam cubes and triangles and surrounded by a thick styrofoam wall.

Killian nudges one of the shapes with her foot lightly. It goes flying.

Suddenly, they're interrupted by a roar. Not a very fearsome one, though. Carey does better ones when she yawns in the mornings.

A man wearing a – shitty – skeleton costume and a dragon mask is standing in the middle of the arena. When he sees that he has their full attention, he calls out: “Roar! I'm Skelly the skeleton dragon! I can only be defeated by-”

“Guys!” Angus interrupts excitedly, “I've got this!” And he casts magic missile.

The three adults just watch as every single magical arrow impacts with the 'dragon'. The guy in the costume collapses in a heap.

“Uh... Great job, Angus.” Killian says, and Carey ruffles his hair affectionately. “Our little monster.”

“Y'all,” Noelle calls out, “check out these... fire balls.”

She's floating above Skelly – ostensibly to check if he's still breathing – but clearly got distracted by the nearby bucket. She tips it over and several red and orange foam balls roll out.

“This is kind of... low budget, huh? I'm not sure why the Director was so emotional.”

“It's not quite over yet! Please move on to the final chamber. Also, is he dead?”

“... No?” Carey answers. “Probably not.”

“I'll send in a healer. So if you could make your way up the stairs-”

The four of them – Noelle trailing behind with a foam ball in hand – leave through the door that just opened up.

'The final chamber' turns out to be a small but well-lit room with a treasure chest.  
“Not all dungeons are this literal about the treasure,” Carey notes wrily. “Also, I think I got one of these boxes for my eighth birthday. What's it made of, cardboard?”

“It's what's inside that matters,” Angus says.

“God, it's contagious. Soon you'll be Art 2.0.” Carey smiles at him to show she's just teasing.

Angus looks over at the box, then back to his team mates. “You're not a tiny bit curious what's inside?”

“Open it,” Noelle encourages. The four of them crowd around the chest as Angus carefully pushes the lid open. He's rewarded by confetti and a scroll springing out of it. He catches the scroll and unrolls it far enough that he can see the word 'Friendship' emblazoned on it.

“... Huh.”

“Is that it?”

“What's the matter, guys? You don't seem to be having much fun. Is there a problem?”

“Well... No... but it's just...” Carey says, trying to be diplomatic. “So far it's been-”

“Boring,” Killian interrupts. “I was expecting more actual valuable life lessons and less of a preschooler's birthday party meets cheap haunted house.”

“Oh my. So you think the Trial of Teamwork is boring?”

Carey shrugs. “To be fair, it was really easy...”

“Easy, huh? You should have said so!”

They have enough time to exchange a confused glance before the floor vanishes beneath them.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I upd the rating to T - there's nothing really mature but some canon typical violence and a lot of swearing and some angst. So, you know, just in case.

At the foot of the long, spiralling slide, they crash and sprawl out on a hard stone floor.

"Damn it," Carey grumbles, sounding a little muffled.

“Angus, are you okay? Guys?” Noelle calls out.

Killian, who landed face first, tries not to get gravel in her mouth as she pushes herself up. When she looks around, she spots Carey getting up and Noelle helping a slightly scruffy Angus to his feet.

"You alright, Kils?" Carey asks, sauntering over. Killian wipes the slow trickle of blood from her nose and nods. She gets to her feet and slowly turns, surveying their surroundings.

The room they landed in looks like the one they were just in but is completely different. The dimensions are the same, but all the papermaché is gone; the room is all stone. It's dark and damp, like a real dungeon.

Angus sniffs. “Is that the smell you guys were talking about?”

“Kind of.”

Killian and Carey exchange a wary look. Killian readies her crossbow. “Stay close together, guys.”

They make their way towards the only door. Its hinges are rusty and Carey has to use a decent amount of force to kick it open. The second they step through they're greeted by a sweltering heatwave. It's pretty obvious very quickly where the source of that heat is.

In the middle of the room is a glowing, bubbling pit of lava. They each step into the room and just sort of stare for a bit.

“Literal lava,” Angus whispers after a moment.

Killian shifts. “Is it just me or did the planks get more narrow?”

“Oh dear,” Noelle beeps out.

“C'mon, guys, we've got this!” Carey says, stepping forward. Immediately Killian catches her arm and pulls her back.

“Carey, I love you, but I'm going to have a heart attack if you cartwheel across this. Can we just take this seriously?”

“You're no fun,” Carey says, but kisses her cheek. “Alright. Angus, do you want to go first?”

“O-Okay...”

“I'll come with you,” Noelle says. She offers him a hand and he gratefully accepts.

Very, very carefully, the two of them make their way across, Noelle floating slighty ahead and to the left of Angus.

When they're on the other side, Angus lets out a relieved sigh. Then he turns and gives Killian and Carey a thumbs up. Noelle copies him a moment later.

“Cute,” Carey whispers. Then she turns to her girlfriend and gives her a toothy grin. “Need me to hold your hand too?”

“Yes,” Killian says immediately, taking it.

Carey blinks. Then she snorts and says, “You don't need an excuse to hold my hand, y'know. That's kind of how dating works?”

“I'm kind of an idiot. You'll have remind me of that pretty often...”

“When did you get this smooth?” Carey shakes her head, but does leans in when Killian goes for a kiss. After a second, she pushes her back and declares, “Enough flirting, we have a floating robot to show up.”

To Killian's immense relief, Carey decides to leave off any flashy flips or tricks. She just makes her way across normally and – with her usual gracefullness – has no trouble with it at all.

Killian starts walking the second her girlfriend is safely on the other side. “This is easy,” she mutters, and only a second later she stumbles.

For a breathless second, she's falling, but immediately she grabs onto the plank and – using her momentum – swings herself back up. She lands on her feet and teeters for a second.

“Get it together, Kils,” Carey calls, and Killian straightens up. She slowly makes her way across the rest of the boards. The second she's made it back on solid ground, Carey and Angus and Noelle all crowd around her.

“That was really scary,” Angus hiccups. Killian gives him an alarmed look.

Noelle, bless her, notices Killian's discomfort and gives Angus a quick hug. “It was. But Killian's fine. And we made it through the first trial!”

***

The second time, the wall is made of metal, not wood.

“No way to jam my dagger into there,” Carey observes. There seem to be some fingerholds, but it’s going to take one dexterous climber to make use of them.

“See those belts? On the crates.” Art suddenly chimes in. It's grating as always, but also kind of reassuring. This room has speakers, too. They're still doing the Trial of Teamwork.

Killian wanders closer to the foot of the wall, where, on two wooden crates, lies some kind of… roping? Safety cords? When she picks one of them up, she realises it's actually two harnesses connected by a tether. “For this one you're going to have to choose a partner. Try not to get landed with dead weight! Art out.”

Killian turns to Carey hopefully just to see that she's already helping Angus into the harness connected to her own. “Aw man.”

Noelle is floating politely next to her. “Ready to go on up?”

“Yeah,” Killian nods. “Need help with the harness?”

“Thank you.”

The two teams stand side-by-side at the foot of the wall. Carey grins at Killian and says, “Race you? Last to the top does the laundry for a month.”

Then she crouches down, calling over her shoulder to Angus behind her: “Hop on!”

The second he's secured to her back, Carey jumps up and starts climbing. Roughly halfway up, she's forced to a standstill. She's calls out: “Hey Angus? I'm kind of stuck.  and I really don't want to lose to Killian and Noelle. Can you do, I don't know, anything to give me a hand?”

Angus clutches her tighter as he excitedly says, “I have an idea!” And casts Mage Hand.

The blueish hand materializes out of nothing just above Carey and she uses it as a hand and foothold to scramble the rest of the way up the wall.

But before she can reach the top, Killian and Noelle blast past her, Noelle attached to Killian like some kind of jetpack and giving her a boost as she climbs up the wall.

“Damn,” Carey says, pulling herself up the rest of the way and then crouching down to Angus can get off. “We almost had it.”

Their belts disengage and clank to the floor. Carey kicks hers off the wall moodily.

“You did pretty well,” Killian concedes. “Especially against us, the dream team.” She highfives Noelle.

“We did steal your piggyback idea,” Noelle admits.

“Don't tell them that!”

Carey gives Killian a narrow-eyed look. The orc smiles sheepishly and says, “Call it a draw?”

“Fine. I'm just proud of Angus here,” Carey says. “That was quick thinking, using Mage Hand like that.”

Angus brightens up visibly. “Thanks, ma'am!”  
“But – and correct me if I'm wrong – couldn't we have just used Mage Hand to lift us up to the top?”

Angus is silent for a second as he considers that. Then he covers his face with his hands in embarrassment and says, “I'm an _idiot_.”

“Shit.”

“If you feel like throwing yourself off a cliff,” Art interrupts cheerfully, “you're going to love the next trial!”

Angus groans at the reminder they're not done yet.

Killian returns Carey's helpless look with a shrug and offers: “Angus, you're not an idiot. In fact, you're the smartest ten year old I know.”

“Besides, if you'd had done all the heavy lifting, it'd wouldn't have been team work, now would it?”

“That's true,” Angus agrees after a moment.

Her two team mates give Noelle amazed stares and she laughs self consciously. “What?”

“How are you so good with-” _kids_ “-people?”

“Four younger siblings,” Noelle says. She sounds kind of sad at the reminder.

Art interrupts before Killian can offer any comfort (and probably stick her foot in her mouth in the process) to say: “It's time for trial number three! This one's a doozy. All you have to do is jump down this 15 foot metal wall onto a hard stone floor and not die! Sounds great, right?”

“Noelle, will you do the honours?”

“Sure,” she says, somehow conveying the idea of a smile entirely without a face, and floats down the stairs to move into catching position.

“Ohh,” Carey says. “I want to go first. Noe, think you can handle a backflip?”

“You got it!”

“Alright!” Carey says, starting on some stretches. “Hey Angus, want to see something awesome?”

“Oh heck yes! … You're not going to get hurt, are you?”

“You're a good kid, Ango,” Carey smiles. “Noelle's catching me, right? And I'm under strict orders from Killian to only show off if I'm 90% sure I can do it.”

“Make that 100,” Killian calls to her.

“Pssh. Yeah.” Carey gives the two of them a cheerful wave before jumping. A second later there’s a dull thud.

Killian and Angus hurry to the edge to look down and see Carey and Noelle, amicably chatting with Carey still in Noelle's arms. Carey sees them looking and gives them a big thumbs up.

“I'm going next,” Killian decides. “Carey, it's your turn to catch me, alright? You better not fucking drop me like you did in that swamp.”

“But that was so funny,” Carey insists. She gives her girlfriend a toothy grin.

“Carey's not scared of you at all, huh?” Angus comments with a small smile.

Killian frowns. “Why should she be?”

“Well, you're this big muscular orc.. lady, and you have a giant crossbow-”

“But I wouldn't hurt Carey. And she knows that. Besides, making fun of me is her way of flirting.” She looks down at the stone floor and winces. “I really hope Carey doesn't drop me. She just might, because I think she's still mad at me I almost get hurt in the lava trial. Oh well. Time to bite the bullet.”

She stands with her back to the ledge and winks at Angus. “You're up next, big boy.” And then she lets herself fall backwards.

Carey catches her, of course, but then pretends to drop her just to get the satisfaction of Killian tightening her arms around her and clinging. “Did it hurt?”

Killian's eyebrow twitches. “What?”

“When you fell from heaven.”

“Uggghhh,” Killian protests. “That one was bad, Carey. Real bad. We're gonna work on that.”

“No kiss for me?” Carey says. She's a scaly toothy lizardperson and her pout should _not_ be as adorable as it is.

Killian gives her a quick peck on the lips before disentangling herself.

“Ango,” she calls up, “I'm ready!”

“Here I come!”, he calls down, still a little nervous but so much braver than the last time he did this. He even closes his eyes before he drops.

Killian catches him and gently sets him on the ground. “We're going to get fantasy McDonald's tonight,” she jokes, “you're a flyweight.”

“I am only ten, so...” Angus says. “Besides, I've been trying to get a, a little muscle going here!”

Carey leans onto Killian's shoulder and smiles at Angus over it. “Brain's the most important muscle you've got, kid. Now, Noelle? Your turn to cannonball.”

Angus blanches. “Please don't cannonball.”

Noelle laughs and makes her way up the stairs. Killian and Carey step back a little to give Angus some room (but stay close enough that they can still intervene if it looks like the World's Greatest Detective is about to crushed by a not-so-floating hunk of metal).

It's pretty anticlimatic in the end. Noelle turns her flotation device off, like with Carey, but this time she reactivates it just before impact and takes the brunt of the force off Angus.

Angus grunts a little when she collides with him but does manage to catch and hold her. He blinks. “I- I did it!”

“You sure did,” Noelle says with amusement in her voice, “looks like you have plenty o' muscle already.”

“Another trial cleared! Gosh, you four are so sweet. And not a single one of you went for the rubies! I'm moved.”

Killian frowns. “What rubies?”

Art is silent for a moment until he asks, incredulously: “Did _none_ of you even notice the rubies? That's, well, that sort of defeats the point of the test.”

“Art, I can promise you,” Carey says, crossing her fingers behind her back, “none of us would have gone for the rubies even if we had seen them. A friend's safety is more important than like, a thousand gold pieces.”

Killian is doing the thing where she's trying not to laugh and ends up looking really angry instead. Angus gives her a confused look. “Are you that upset about the rubies?”

“No,” is all Killian offers.

Carey laughs at her struggle, the ass.

“Alright then,” she says, doing a quick weapons inventory. “On to the- fourth? Fifth? This is ridiculous.”  
“Next is the _final_ trial,” Art declares, “I hope you’re ready!”

“Are we ever?”

***

Ghoulish, is the first word that comes to Killian’s mind. The cobblestone archway, the skeletons and blood spatters that dot the hallway before you even get to the Arena – It’s all pretty horrifying.

“Blood’s real,” Carey reports, and of course she would know. Dragonborn sense of smell.

That… doesn’t sit right with Killian.

“Oh dear,” Noelle says mildly.

“Uh, um, we should probably… prepare ourselves,” Angus says, putting on a brave face even as he clutches his wand in a whiteknuckled grip.

Killian does a quick ammunition check. Then she nods firmly.

“We can do this,” she says. “Noelle, no playing the hero, got it? Don’t be reckless. And Carey? For once, I am giving you explicit permission to do as many ridiculous flips as you want. Don’t let whatever we’re going to face get a hit in. Angus?” Angus nods at her, frowning in concentration. “Hide. Not because I don’t think you can do this, but because you’re small and slight and a fucking wizard. You’re our ace in the hole.”

“You got it,” Angus says. “You’re gonna be careful too, right?”

“Sure,” Killian says with a shrug. “Carey’s not the only one who can dodge.”

Angus hesitantly returns her grin. But then he pauses and turns to Carey with a determined look on his face. "Um," he says, "I just realised - and I didn't want to say anything but in case something, uh, happened in there I thought I should be honest - and really it's not a big deal and I hope you think I'm not being a knowitall, Ma'am, I'm not trying to be, be superior to you or anything I just-"

"Angus," Carey says, grinning at him. "Chill. Just say it."

"Right." He takes a deep breath. "Mage Hand wouldn't have been able to lift us to the top in the second trial," he bursts out, "I'm sorry but I remembered the limitations of the spell and-"

"That's what this is about?" Carey says, tilting her head. "Ango, it's fine. God knows I'm not a magic user. Actually... it's kind of reassuring. You really know your stuff, huh? That's gonna be helpful in this battle."

Angus blinks. "R-really?"

"Really," Carey confirms, ruffling his hair. Noelle and Killian smile. "I think we've pretty much got this in the bag."

***

"Holyshitwedefinitelydonotgotthis," Carey says, rolling out of the way as an _actual literal skeletal dragon_ brings it's giant claws down where she was just standing. How is it aiming so well? It doesn't have _eyes_.

"Care!" Killian calls out, crossbow aimed at the ribcage and firing, "watch out for the head!"

Carey turns, spots the giant floating dragon head - seriously, what the hell - and flips out of the way when a burst of flame comes shooting out of it's mouth. Stupid Art and his stupid teamwork penalty. When she gets out of here she's going to-

Noelle zooms to her side, raises her canon arm and fires. The spine jutting from the dragon's head disintigrates into dust. The rest of the head lets out a furious roar loud enough to rattle the walls of the arena. "Oh dear."

"What now?" Carey says. She should really have invested in some ranged weapons. Only an idiot would get close to this mess.

Angus, as it turns out, is an idiot. He darts out from where he's hiding and dashes towards the head... no, the body... both? He stumbles a little on the uneven terrain (literally bones, what in the fuck) but comes to a stop right between the ribcage and head. Carey wants to ask _what the hell he thinks he's doing, young man,_ but she doesn't want to call attention to him since he seems to have somehow managed to slip under their guard.

She throws a dagger at the ribcage, instead, hoping to gaude it into focusing on her.

With a frown of concentration, Angus brandishes his wand and calls out clearly: "I cast Thunderwave!"

He's close enough to hit both of them, which must have been the idea. The ribcage barely stumbles, only one of its eight ribs breaking off. But the _head_ is sent flying. It collides with the wall and shatters.

"Way to go, Ango," Killian says, suddenly right next to him. She picks him up and throws him towards Carey and Noelle an instant before the ribcage brings its claws down.

Hissing in pain, Killian dances back and presses her free hand to her bloodied side. She ignores her team mate's concerned calls and fires off another crossbolt at the ribcage, missing narrowly. "Shit fuck goddamn."

"Goddamn shit," Carey agrees, sprinting to her side and taking in Killian's condition with a glance. She has her rapier in hand, holding it gingerly like the unfamiliar weight it is.

They duck down instinctively when a sudden blast off energy shoots over their heads and into the ribcage. It explodes on impact, destroying two of the ribs and blasting the dragon back several feet.

"Are y'all okay?" Noelle says, floating towards them with Angus hurrying next to her. "We were so worried."

"It's barely a scratch," Killian promises. "And right now we have bigger fish to fry."

The four of them turn towards the ribcage. Carey eyes the skeletal remains and says, "God I wish we had a cleric with us right now."

The ribcage pauses, tilts the stump of spine where its head used to be curiously.

"That's right bitch," Carey calls over, "we'd have exorcised you in a second. As things are, we're just going to have to chop you into tiny pieces. And _fuck you for hurting my girlfriend_."

She lunges forward, rapier posed to carve a chunk of bone out of its side. Out of the corner of her eye, she can see Noelle and Killian taking aim, Angus thumbing through his book of spells rapidly.

It's pretty much over after that. The ribcage doesn't hold long against being fileted, several crossbow bolts and two blasts of energy (one magical and one robotic) all in the space of a few seconds. It collapses backwards into the pile of bones, motionless.

"Well," Killian says, lowering her crossbow, "that sure was something." She looks down at her wound and winces.

"That was _awesome_!" Carey gushes. "I love you guys! ... Except you," she says, pointing a claw at Killian and glaring, "what did I say about getting hurt?"

Angus sniffles. The two adults turn to him with identical looks of alarm on their faces.

"S-sorry," Angus hiccups, "I'm sorry. I thought I was being really clever and I wanted to help with magic but Killian got hurt because of me and-"

"Killian got hurt because she's a dumbass who forgot to dodge," Carey corrects him firmly.

"Really feeling the love, babe," Killian deadpans.

"You shut your hell mouth," Carey says, but leans into her - uninjured - side and gives her a quick, careful hug. "Angus, you did great. You took out that floating head before it could fry our asses, remember?"

"Right! You all did well," Noelle says. A compartment in her body opens and out comes a familiar syringe filled with green fluid. "Killian, let's fix you up real quick."

"Hey Angus," Carey says, taking advantage of his convenient shortness to use him as an elbow rest, "You want to see something really sad? Check out this grown ass orc lady and how she's scared of needles."

"I just don't like them when I don't know what's in them," Killian replies, crossing her arms defensively.

"That's not a problem!" Noelle says, and starts printing out a list of ingredients. It's several feet long.

She pales. "Uhh... you know what, Noelle? I think I'm good."

"Oh. Of course. Nevermind, then..."

Killian rolls her eyes. How can a faceless, expressionless robot look so dejected? "Fine. Let me have it."

Noelle's fuse lights up happily and she injects her with the mystery fluid. Immediately, Killian's wound starts to close. Her nose even stops hurting from when Art dropped the floor beneath them.

"I think it's time to keep going," Angus says, nodding over to the other end of the arena, where a portcullis was raised and an exit opened. They make their way towards this door, Carey grumbling as they do. "It's still not over? Look, we trialed, we teamworked, we bonded. Can't we just head back to our bunks and take a nap?"

"Well," Angus says, pushing his glasses up his nose a little and looking up the long, narrow staircase the door led to, "if this follows the same pattern as before, the next one should be the treasure chamber."

Carey shrugs, leading the way up the stairs. "Eh. I suppose we can stop and pick up some treasure before we get out of here."

***

This treasure chest is a lot more satisfying. The set up is the same - with it as a centerpiece of a small but well lit circular room - but it's an actual authentic wooden chest with golden hinges and a lot more authentic.

"This is more like it," Killian says approvingly. "Angus, want to open it?"

Angus steps forward and takes a closer look at the chest. "I dunno," he says, not looking at them even as he starts blushing. "The lid looks pretty heavy. I might need some help."

His party members smile down at him. "Alright," Killian says. "We'll all do it together."

The four of them gather around the chest and open it on the count of three. Immediately a wave of force emits from the chest and slams them backwards, knocking the wind out of Killian and knocking her on her back.

"What the fuck," she says, and tries to get up. But she can't move. Magic, then, which would explain why she feels so weak right now.

The loudspeaker clicks on again - for the first time since the second trial - but instead of an explanation, things just get more confusing.

"You all made this... way too easy," a voice rings out. It's Art Goodfriend, but for once he's not chirpy or helpful. Instead he sounds serious and quietly smug. "Did you really not recognise me the whole time? Did you really not recognise the face of the man whose life you ruined so long ago...? Well. I suppose it's not important now."

Killian starts struggling against the force that's immobilising her, but it's no use. Somewhere to her left she hears Carey quietly curse when Art continues: "I admit this is a fairly circuouis method of getting my revenge. But it worked, didn't it? Goodbye, jerks."

Spikes shoot out of the ceiling and with a rumble, it starts to lower. Killian stops struggling. "Wait! Art, wait, whatever your beef with us is, Angus is just a little kid, you need to get him out, he doesn't deserve any of this-"

There's no reply, just the impending doom as the spikes continue to lower towards them. Then the quiet sobs start up.

"Angus," Noelle says, gentle. "You're going to be fine. We'll figure something out, get out of here, everything is gonna be okay-"

"You don't have to lie to me," Angus hiccups out, "I, I'm a kid but even I can see we're f-fucked."

"I'm not lying, Angus," Noelle says, voice getting a little more desperate. "Everything really is going to be okay. Dying's not so bad. Trust me."

Killian swallows. She can't turn her head, can't look at her, but she knows Carey is just a few feet away from her. "Carey," she says, "thank you. I wish we could have had more time because I'm pretty sure you're the love of my life but if we're going to die now I'm so grateful I got to meet you and love you and. And at least I'm not here alone. Everyone..." She pauses. "Thank you."

There's a moment of silence. The spikes are more than halfway down now, extinguishing the torches and leaving them in complete darkness, so Killian can't see Carey but she can hear her grunt with effort to break free, to move, to do _something_. "Bull. Shit," Carey huffs out. "We can... we've got to do something. I don't want to die yet! I want to... I want to go on adventures with all of you! I want to hear Noelle laugh and Angus say something clever and I want to flirt with Killian and I'm not about to let some guy with a ridiculous name just end that before it can happen." She manages to raise her legs, bracing her feet on the ceiling between spikes and _pushing._ But it's no use.

"Carey," Killian says, voice thick with emotion, "Noelle, Angus, I love all of you-"

The floor vanishes beneath them.

***

The second time going down a slide is somehow even worse than the first. It's... disorienting, to say the least, to go from certain death to cobblestone archway and filtered sunlight.

Killian picks herself up from the floor and looks around. The second she spots Carey only a few feet away her vision tunnels and she scrambles over to hold her.

"We're okay," she whispers, voice full of disbelief. She's cradling Carey's face in her hand, thumb absently smoothing over the scales covering her cheeks.

"We did it!" Carey laughs. She kisses Killian on the nose and then turns to look around. "And we're back in the first chamber."

Angus carefully sits up. One of his lenses is cracked, but other than that he seems fine. Well. He's still sniffling a little. Mostly fine.

Killian wipes the own tears from her face and weakly jokes, "Talk about trials, huh?"

"Agreed." Noelle is floating again and inspecting her canon arm for damage. It looks lightly scorched from the force of her attack against the dragon. "Is everyone okay?"

"Define 'okay'. But I'm about ready to kill Art," Killian says.

"Maybe even the Director," Carey chimes in. "God, I can't believe this shit was mandato... ry..." She pauses, stunned.

"What's wrong?" Angus asks.

"I just... Oh god," Carey says, doubling over with laughter. "I just remembered, ha, who, who else is on this excursion with us."

The three of them exchange confused looks. Carey stops laughing long enough to gasp out, "Magnus and, and the guys are going to be so so bad at this..." There are tears streaming down her face as she's trying to picture how that would go.

Killian starts _giggling_. It's probably the left over adrenaline, or the relief at surviving a near death experience, or maybe the thought of how badly those three are going to fuck up a challenge based around working together is just that fucking funny.

Art is standing by the entrance when they finally emerge, Noelle with Angus on her shoulders and Killian and Carey holding hands. With Art are three familiar and one kind-of-familiar faces. Taako looks like he literally just got up and there's some Cheeto dust smeared around his mouth. Magnus looks energetic as ever and Merle is side-eyeing the fourth team member, that guy from HR. What an absolute disaster of a team.

Carey can't entirely keep the glee out of her voice when she tells them: "Oh my God, Taako, you gotta get in there, it's life changing stuff."

She cheerfully greets and then ignores the HR guy. When the exchange is over and Art is still standing by the gate, Killian walks up to him.

He turns to the four of them cheerfully and says: "Seems to me you just finished your trial of teamwork! Congratulations!" He hands Killian a golden medallion. Killian eyes it and hands it over to Angus.

"I've decided not to punch you, Art," she says.

"Oh goodie."

Killian continues with a glare, "But scaring a ten year old like that was fucked up and I'm 100% behind Ango if he feels the need to deck you."

"Uhh," Angus goes. "It's fine?"

Art wilts under the force of Killian's glare and feebly offers: "There's some pancakes left? Usually after 9 AM they're staff only but you can say I sent you..."

"Sounds good," Killian says, taking Carey's hand in her own again and shooting Angus a quick smile. "Let's go, guys."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a lot of fun!  
> I actually rolled a few times to see how they would do and that was just a Good Call. Some memorable occassions include:  
> Killian rolling a 3 in the 1st trial on her acrobatic check and then getting a nat 20 for her dexterity save.  
> I made Carey roll for flirting as a joke on the 3rd trial and she got a 2. Luckily her gf loves her anyway.  
> 


End file.
